For three long, tedious, arduous years, I stood under a big bucket of suck called an ALS diagnosis. For those of you unsure of what this is, Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis destroys your motor nerves: no motor nerves, no moving, no breathing , no eating. It’s typically a 2 year water slide to a horrific clusterfuck of a death.
In July, I got a ray of sunshine. My doctor said at that point , I should be dead. I was only getting stronger. So, if I had no other symptoms by January, I was free of the diagnosis. It’s January now, and I’ve been freed completely. It was assumed that my Rheumatoid Disease had attacked my motor nerves, but with remission from the RA, the symptoms vanished.
Still, those three years will leave their mark for good and ill. I conditioned myself to emotionally numb myself from many things, and with Borderline Personality Disorder, I might never reattach to those things.
I’m not wasting time anymore now that my life’s returned. Priorities are different now. Fear has diminished, there’s just no point to it. So, onward and upward.