Sexuality

Open Marriages

So many friends who otherwise have open minds wonder at the concept of open marriage. Especially my open marriage, which stuns people. How can I stand the thought of Daniel with another woman? What if she tries to take him away? What if he finds someone else and leaves? What if you do? These are valid questions. Let’s start in general, and go specific, shall we?
Open marriage is the agreement between two parties  who don’t make fidelity a part of their marriage. They might have been part of an earlier, emotionally trying marriage. Or, they might just not believe monogamy works. So, couples set an agreement to see other partners outside of marriage with various conditions. Some of our friends in open marriages don’t allow kissing outside the marriage, etc. Then, they live their lives.

Is there jealousy? Depends on the couple. Some pairs do an open marriage for a very short time because they can’t deal with the jealousy, or insecurity. And that’s all jealousy is really, the insecurity of self. It all boils down to the strength of the core marriage. If you feel that loyalty is more important than fidelity, all is well. One needs to feel secure that your partner will come home, no matter what. Not many can reach that.

Yes, I am openly married to Daniel, for 10 years. I don’t often mention him here, because I think he needs his own privacy. Our marriage’s always been open, since we were swingers when we met. We both have had outside partners, he more than I because of illness. Are we a perfect couple, no, who is? We are still together, and love each other, and that’s all that matters.

Advertisements

One thought on “Open Marriages

  1. Do you! I’m in a very casual sex phase, but I see myself in an open relationship if I were to ever get serious with someone again. I used to not understand it, but that was when I was young and naive and in a longterm monogamous relationship. I think if it works for you, awesome. It’s not for everyone, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t work for other people, and you are a great example of that. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s